The Way It Should Be
by spike-is-so-hot
Summary: Picks up at Angel season finale Buffy and the gang help bring the apocalypse to an end. Buffy and Spike are finally together after some confusion .Cordelia is back.Please R&R.
1. Real Feelings

_**Buffy The Vampire Slayer/**__**Angel Fanfiction**_

**The Way It Should Be**

_picks up just before Angel season 5 finale_

**Chapter One**

Buffy couldn't believe it. She knew that Andrew had been hiding something. She had been so angry when he finally told her. Spike was alive. Or as alive as a vampire with a soul could be. Andrew had known ever since he had gone to get Dana (an unstable slayer who had been put in a mental institution after here family was brutally murdered and had been abducted and tortured by the killer). How could he keep something like that a secret? After all she had done for him. Ok, so he had been tied to a chair for most of the time, but that wasn't the point. She had allowed him to stay in her house and he had practically become one of the gang. Well, sort of. Giles is training him to be a watcher.

To tell the truth Buffy wasn't all that bothered about the whole L.A. thing. The thing that bothered her was that he didn't tell her when both Angel and Spike where here in Rome. What made it even worse was the fact that Andrew had told them to move on and forget about Buffy. How could he tell them that? She had never planned to stay with the Immortal for long. Buffy had just wanted to have some fun with a guy who already knew she was the slayer. Ok a slayer. Even though she wasn't the only the only slayer anymore, she was by far the best. She was the leader. Now back to the point. Losing Spike had hurt real bad. She missed him so much. Back in Sunnydale she really had started to fall for him, although she had always had a soft spot for him, even when she had still been with Riley, but she had never wanted to admit it. Yes, Buffy really had fallen in love with Spike. There had been moments in that last year they had together when she thought she might have told him, but she had always chickened out at the last second. There was that one time in the basement when she almost did, on the last night they spent together, but every time she looked at him she forgot how to form the words. Then they were down in the hellmouth and Spike was sacrificing himself to save the world. Buffy deeply regretted waiting until that moment to tell him. If only she had made her feelings clear earlier then maybe, just maybe, he would have believed her.

Buffy had been putting on a brave face for her friends but the truth was that it hurt so bad that she wished that she could have been the one who'd died. Third times the charm. All the old feelings she had had when she had been dragged out of heaven had come flooding back to her. What was the point in life if the one person she truly loved wasn't there to live it with her. She knew she couldn't give up on it though. Too many people depend on her. She has lots of responsibilities, more than enough, Dawn, her friends, the new slayers and watchers, saving the day. Buffy had been taking a break for a while but it was time to go back to work. She was calling all the shots, her friends still felt kind of guilty for kicking her out of her own house, so they were letting her take the lead as it is what she is best at. Her feelings for Spike weren't the only thing that she was hiding from the gang. It was the only thing that kept her from breaking down into tears in front of the scoobies.


	2. Reminiscing

**Chapter Two**

One day when Buffy was really depressed about losing Spike, she locked herself away in her bedroom, telling Dawn that she wasn't feeling well and that she didn't want to be disturbed. She lay on her bed, holding Spike's lighter, which she had found on the bus (the one they used to get out of Sunnydale). It must have fallen out of his pocket. Anyway, she began running her thumb over the smooth metal, crying in complete heartache as she thought about all the good times they had had together. How she longed to hear his voice again, to look deep into his eyes and see the love within them (if it was still there), to feel his cool touch against her warm, soft skin, even if it was only a hug or for her hand to be in his. She just wanted to see him again. She wished for someone to talk to, who would understand, someone who didn't hate Spike. She dried her eyes, deciding she would go for a walk to attempt to clear her head. She had no idea that her wish was about to come true.

She hadn't really wanted to walk to anywhere in specific, but she found herself on a hilltop, looking down at the city before her. Rome really was a beautiful place. She sat down on the grass, leaning against a tree. She watched as the day slowly slipped into night. Buffy gazed up at the sky and saw what appeared to be a shooting star, but it kept getting closer and closer. Suddenly she realised it was heading straight towards her. She got up and started walking away when it crashed down to earth like a bolt of lightning. At first it was to bright to even look at, so Buffy had to close her eyes, but then, slowly and gradually the light ebbed away and she could just make out the figure of a woman. As the figure came closer Buffy gasped as she realised who the woman standing before her was.


	3. Realisation

**Chapter Three**

"Tara, is that really you?" she managed to say, her voice full of doubt.

"Yes Buffy its me," the witch replied softly.

Buffy ran forward and hugged her friend. She couldn't believe what had just happened.

"Oh god Tara, I'm so glad you're back. I've missed you, everyone has. Everything's just been so messed up, there's so much to tell you. You have no idea how glad I am to see you. I just really need to talk to you … and god, could I be more self absorbed, you just came back from the dead and I'm…" Buffy rambled, trailing off when Tara interrupted.

"Sweetie, you're not being self absorbed, honestly, you tell me everything and anything, right down to the tiniest detail, I'm here for you any time you need me. There's just one thing I want you to do, that is if you don't mind?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"I don't want the gang to know that I'm back yet. I want to wait until the time is right, you know, give myself time to readjust, is that ok?"

"Of course it is silly," Buffy replied.

But, as usual, the right time had not come yet. Everyone was still trying to settle in as the rest of the gang had only recently joined Buffy, Dawn and Andrew in Rome. Willow was still with that bitch Kennedy. They had been getting along fine for a while but Kennedy was just getting too wrapped up about being a slayer and was often out. Buffy had told Willow that she should speak to Kennedy because she doesn't have the right to blow her off all the time. But Willow said that everything was fine and that things would work out. She wanted to tell her about Tara so that she could just dump Kennedy, but Tara didn't want them to intervene as she wasn't even sure if Willow would want to get back with her.


	4. Reunited

_Thank you Candy04 for your review. In taking your advice this chapter is longer. If anyone else wants to give a review please do, I want to know what you think. Please. Ok, hope you enjoy this chapter._

**Chapter Four**

Buffy woke up and was contemplating what she was going to do. She could hear footsteps coming down the hall. She could tell it was Dawn from the foot pattern. Buffy's younger sister knocked on her door before she got a reply.

"Buffy time to get up," Dawn said cheerily, walking over to her sister's window and opening the curtains.

"Dawnie, go away! I just wannto. and she definitely didn't want to stay in the house if she wasn't getting to sleep. She needed to see Tara. Tara, unlike her so-called friends, actually cared. Buffy had just split up with the Immortal and they hadn't shown any sign of sympathy. She didn't really feel like talking to Giles and she definitely didn't want to stay in the house if she wasn't getting to sleep. She needed to see Tara. Tara, unlike her so-called friends, actually cared. Buffy had just split up with the Imown any sign of sympathy. She didn't really feel like talking to Giles and she definitely didn't want to stay in the house if she wasn't getting to sleep. She needed to see Tara. Tara, unlike her so-called friends, actually cared. Buffy had just split up with the Immortal and they hadn't even shown the slightest sign of sympathy. Even though she hadn't really been upset, it would have been nice if at least one of them asked how she was. Buffy had had a weird dream last night and she wanted Tara to look into it. It was the third night in a row that she'd had the dream. She really was hoping that it was just another pointless dream and not a prophetic one, because if it is then Angel and Spike are in trouble.

"Morning Buffster how's your arm this morning?" Xander asked as she walked over to the fridge.

"What? Oh yeah, that. I forgot I even hurt it. You know us slayers. We heal super fast. So you working today Xand?"

"Yeah, I think I'll be home early though. The job is almost complete," Xander was back in construction.

"So Will, are you staying or going out with Kennedy?" Buffy asked the goddess.

"I think I'll stay and help you and Giles."

"Great, I can always use an extra hand with the computer stuff," Buffy said.

"So, how's everyone's pancakes. I know there not as good as Ta..." Willow stopped speaking unable to finish her sentence.

"There the best pancakes ever, don't you agree, Buff, Xand?" Dawn said quickly.

"Yep, the best ever, right Xander?" Buffy said nudging her friend.

"Definitely."

"Well, eat up Dawn, you don't want to be late for school, do you?" Buffy said changing the subject.

"No, wouldn't want that," Dawn murmured.

Buffy dropped Dawn off at school and then decided to go get some muffins for her and Willow. Willow had still been upset when Buffy, Dawn and Xander had left the house. Buffy needed to think of something to cheer theher up. She had never seen Willow act like this in a long time. When Buffy was waiting for her order she saw something that made her so angry that she almost knocked someone over as she stormed out of the coffee shop. She apologised to the woman and then took her box ofmuffins outside and put it into the car and grabbed her cell phone.

Willow's phone rang. She was in the middle of talking to Giles on the web cam.

"Excuse me Giles, I'll just be a minute," she said before leaving the room, phone in hand.

"Hello?" Willow inquired.

"Hi Will, it's me, no time for explanations, just get yourself to the coffee place right now, there's something you need to see."

Before Willow could say anything Buffy had already hung up. Willow told Giles she had to go and then teleported herself to the alley behind the coffee shop. She saw Buffy standing by her car and walked over, not quite sure what to expect.

"Buffy what is it, what's..." her eyes were wandering to where Buffy was staring, when her eyes metwhat her friend had wanted her to see her heart sank, "...wrong?"

"I could kill her, make it look like an accident or we could lock her in a room with a wicked strong demon, no wepons, let it tear her apart, you know, whatever you feel is best."

"No, it's ok, I can handle this one on my own, but thanks for the offer."

Willow walked into the shop, Buffy following close behind her, quickening her pace as she neared the bitch who was supposed to be her girlfriend. She tapped Kennedy, who was making out with another girl,on the shoulder. When they came face to face Willow punched her nose. Then turned and walked back to the car with Buffy.

"Willow wait, I can explain!" Kennedy shouted after her.

"No Kennedy, I don't think you can and you shouldn't waste your breath.The next time I see your whorish face it better be an apocolypse, cos unless it is I strongly suggest that you stay the hell away. Don't ever come near me and mine ever again," turning away from Kennedy she added, "Come on Willow, we don't need to associate with scum like her."

_Buffy's P.O.V._

_I knew that cow was trouble from the start. How dare that bitch cheat on Willow. She's lucky to have known her at all. Iwish I could just kill her. Treating my friend like that. She's lucky all she got was a punch in the face. Willow is completely capable of doing something a lot worse. Kennedy got let off easy. I'll need to call Giles and tell him we can't work today. I tried to cheer up Willow but nothing seems to work. She's up in her room sulking. I don't want to leave her in the house by herself, so I'll just wait until Xander comes in and then I'll go see Tara and fill her in. I its time that the rest of the gang know that she's back. They can't know that I already know she's back though cos they'd probably get mad (like they usually do), so that will have to remain our little secret. It'll make Willow happy and that's very important right now. I also need to tell Tara to do a spell to find out if my dream is a prophecy or not. I don't know why but I just have this feeling that its a vision. I really need to know if I'm going to have to help._

Buffy woke with a start, she had had the dream again and this trime it was more vivid. That confimed it. It was going to come true,but evil was not going to win though not if she had something to do with it. She took a shower, got dressed and headed downstairs. Tara was there. She had never seen Dawn or Willow as happy as they were right now in a long time. Seeing Buffy, Dawn ran towards the slayer, wrapping her arms around her. Words couldn't describe how happy Dawn was.

"Tara's back, can you believeit, she's right exactly here, this is so amazing!" Dawn exclaimed, while jumping up and down in front of her sister.

Buffy put on her best surprised yet extremely happy face and walked over to Tara top give her a hug.

"I think we should celebrate, Dawn can take the day off school and we can all go to the beach or something. We have to call Xander and Giles. We're all so glad you're back," Buffy rambled, hoping she hadn't sounded suspicious.

Thankfully Willow and Dawn were too excited too notice. Unfortunately there was abigger problem than Buffy's rambling. Buffy had to round up as many slayers as possible and get them all to L.A. before it was too late. The next day, after giving the guys the 411, Buffy started making phone calls, making sure that everything was organised. They were going to need a lot of transport and fast, they did not have a lot of time.


	5. Raging Battle

Chapter 5 

Angel, Spike, Gunn and Illyria stood before the mass of demons, wondering how many they would kill, how badly they would get injured and whether they would still be standing when it was all over. The demons were advancing on them. The four comrades took one last look at each other before plunging into battle.

"This is gonna be one hell of a fight," Buffy said looking at the demons from the rear of the battle.

"You can count on it B, I'm ready to kick some ass," Faith agreed

Buffy turned to face the other slayers, they were so young and most of them had fear in their eyes.

"Ok, lisaid ready for the fight.

The slayers rushed forward, taking the hell beasts by surprise. Buffy and Faith were in the front, slaying the demons in their wake. The senior partners' numbers were depleting, but some of the younger slayers were being fatally injured aswell. The L.A. gang continued fighting unaware of the help they were recieving. Gunn was losing a lot of blood, adrenoline the only thing keeping him alive. Angel and Spike were doing ok, they were watching each others backs. Illyria was f the younger slayers were being fatally injured aswell. The L.A. gang continued fighting unaware of the help they were recieving. Gunn was losing a lot of blood, adrenoline the only thing keeping him alive. Angel and Spike were doing ok, they were watching each others backs. Illyria was unstoppable. She killed every demon she came into contact with. Then she came face to face with Buffy, they looked at each other for a second, giving each other a nod before plunging back into combat. Illyria knew Buffy was a slayer and she was thinking about telling Angel when she sensed the rest of them. There were at least 200 of them. She realised that, with the help of the slayers, they could win this thing.

The scoobies were also in action and were putting up a pretty good fight. In between killing demons Willow and Tara were trying to help the injured, covering up their wounds and using magic to help those with fatal injuries. Tara saw Gunn fall and immediately rushed over to help him. She dragged him off the battlefield and started attending to him straight away.Willow came over to aid her girlfriend in helping Gunn.

"Hey baby, what's the verdict for Gunn?" the goddess asked.

"Will, he's lost a lot of blood, like way too much, we're gonna have to get him to the a hospital for a transfusion. You know this guy?"

"Yeah he's part of team Angel. I met him when I came here to return Angel's soul. You stay here, I'll take Gunn to the hospital, I've got a feeling they're gonna need you here," Willow said.

"Sweetie your the one who should stay here, I'm not as powerful as you," Tara replied.

"You are powerful Tara, maybe even more than me. You are entirely capable of doing this on your own. I've gotta go now, see you later," she said before giving Tara a kiss on the cheek.

The dragon came swooping down and Angel took his chance to get on it's back, determined that he would be the one to kill it. The dragon flew high up into the air making loops andchanging direction to try and get rid of it's passenger. Then it dived towards the ground at lightning speed. When it was about 10 feet from the ground Angel drove his sword right through the dragon's back and into it's heart. The road shuddered as the dragon hit it. Angel pulled out the sword and jumped off the dragon, turning his attention back to the demons, still oblivious to the fact that the slayers were there.

They fought for hours killing demon after demon, but as the time wore on the casualties became less, slayer mode had finally kicked in. Spike and Angel stopped fighting as their eyes landed on the blonde slayer they both longed for. They watched Buffy as she moved gracefully as if every move was choreographed. It was day break and the sun shone on her hair, Angel and Spike were so mesmerised that they hadn't realised that they were standing in the sunlight. It wasn't untilall the othervamps burst into flames and reduced to dust, that Angel and Spike noticed that they were not. Buffy, Faith and the rest of the scoobies stood before Illyria and the now ex-vampires. They stood in silence, staring away from each other, no one knowing what they could say. They were mostly shocked and confused. Buffy and Spike seemed a littled embarassed. Their situation could not have been more awkward.

After what seemed like an eternity someone finally decided to break the silence.

"But how...what...why aren't captain peroxide and I big piles of dust?" Angel asked.

"Hey, watch it mate," Spike said offended by his comment.

"The Shanshu prophecy has been fufilled," Willow interjected, not wanting an argument to take place.

"But how? I thought it was just about him," Spike said, referring to Angel.

"Well it was about Angel, but it was also about you, prophecies aretricky, you know that, and the Shanshu prophecy has never been able to be properly translated before," Tara told him.

"Then how do you know th..."

"Because we were the ones who prophesised it, me, Tara and Willow," Buffy answered, interupting Angel.

"We saw the prophecy in our past lives," Willow explained.

"You have both been rewarded with your humanity, but as champions you are to valuable to this world so you are still eternally youthful," Tara informed them.

"So basically, it's like your still vamps, but you have a reflection, a pulse, can go in daylight, obviously, but you still run the risk of being killed by a demon,which is highly unlikely,oh and bullets still can't kill you but ow and you're supposed to stop me when I do that," Willow rambled.

"As much as I'd love to stand here and talk all day, I'm beat and I think its fair to say that everyone else is to, so I say we should get some rest and do the talking thing tomorrow," Buffy said, wanting to go before the rest of L.A. woke up and people saw them all just standing there in the middle of the road.

"That sounds good to me," Xander said agreeing.

The other slayers had already started walking to the hotels that Giles had booked. Spike overheard Buffy complaining to Willow about having to sharebeds with the other girls and immediately asked her if she wanted to stay at his place. Buffy accepted his invitation.

The walk to Spike's was a silent one. Neither of them knew what to say. It had been so long since they had a conversation with each other. Spike had been uncharacteristically shy when he had asked Buffy to stay at his apartment. He had been so quiet. Buffy guessed that he might still have feelings for her, which made her feel good inside, but she didn'tknow just how strong those feelings were.

_Spike's P.O.V._

_God she smells so good. And she looks even more amazing than the last time I saw her. I can't believe she actually said yes. Why is this so hard? It wasn't like this before Why am I so nervous? My palms are actually sweating. Maybe that damn soul is finally working. Its Buffy's fault. I want her so much, more than I ever did before, but its more than that. I want her to be mine. I want to see her laugh and smile. I want to have something real._

They entered through a door in the side of a building and then descended the stairs to Spike's apartment. It was really nice. Buffy looked round, impressed by the decor. Spike realised that Buffy didn't have anything to change into, so he went to his bedroom to get her something to wear.

"Here you can put this on," he said handing Buffy a black shirt, "right, you can take the bed, I'll sleep on the couch," he continued, turning to walk away.

"Spike, wait, stay, we can share the bed,"

"No, its ok, really..." Spike started.

"But, I want you to stay, I want you to hold me," Buffy said not wanting to waste time with stupid mind games.

"Right then," Spike nodded, "I'll just get something to drink while you change. Do you want anything?"

"No thanks, I'm good," Buffy replied.

"Buffy?"

"Yes Spike,"

"Nothing," he answered fogetting what he had wanted to say.

When he got back to his room Buffy was sitting on his bed, looking very hot in Spike's shirt, with her sunkissed complexion and her slender legs. She was perfect. At least Spike thought so. They both got into bed, moving into the middle, Buffy rested her head on Spike's chest.

"Night Spike."

"Night Love."

Buffy fell asleep straight away, exhausted from the battle. Spike watched her as she slept peacefully, with a look of content on her face, fearing that if he closed his eyes that he would wake up to find that it was all just a dream. He wished that he could just hold her for forever and never let her go. He hadn't really thought about it, with everything that had been going on, Andrew had told him to move on, but the truth was he could never move on, he really and truely loved Buffy, even more than he ever had before.


	6. Reconnecting

**Chapter 6**

_Thank you to Spike-n-Buffy-eva and spikes-slayer29590 for your reviews hope you enjoy this chapter._

The next morning Spike woke up relieved that the slayer still in his arms. He gently ran his fingers through her hair; she stirred slightly and then slowly opened her eyes.

"Hey," Buffy said in her morning voice.

"Sleep well?" Spike asked.

"Yeah, actually that was the best sleep I've had in months," she replied.

"You hungry?"

"Starving."

"What do you want?"

"Well we should definetely have something edible"

"Right. And since I only have blood in the fridge I guess we'll be eating out," Spike said sitting up in bed.

After they got dressed they headed out to the nearest cafe. Buffy had had to wear her outfit from the day before as her stuff was at the hotel with the rest of the guys. She had taken a shower before they left, but she had wanted to put fresh clothes on. She wanted to look her best for Spike. They didn't talk much as they walked.

When Buffy and Spike entered a small cafe they spotted a familiar 'tall, dark and forehead' guy sipping coffee and downing donuts as if they were tictacs.

"Oh my god, hey Angel, can we join you?" Buffy asked sitting down as Angel gave a slight nod, "How come your on your own?" she continued.

"Well Illyria went to the hospital to check on Gunn and I have no idea where Lorne is," Angel replied.

After some awkward small talk, Buffy and Angel started trading stories about the last year, Spike occasionally adding a comment, which was proving to be a hard task.Once they had finished eating they headed to the Hyperion (Angel had decided to go back to using it as Angel Investigations, since they destroyed the Wolfram Hart building). They continued talking on their way there. The three of them sat down at Angel's old desk, Angel felt strange being back in the hotel.When Angel got to the puppet story, Buffy couldn't stop laughing for nearly twenty minutes straight. Every time Spike went to open his mouth to speak Buffy or Angel would start talking as if he wasn't there. At this point he wouldn't have been surprised if he caught fire and the pair of them continued their little walk down memory lane. Then all of a sudden Buffy's cell phone rang.

"Thank fuck for that," Spike muttered under his breath.

"Hey, oh hi Willow," Buffy said when she answered the phone.

The ex-vamps watched her in silence.

"Yeah, that's great, see you there, bye," she said putting her cell phone back in her pocket, "Look you guys, I've gotta go, Giles got me a place, and well I need to see my friends anyway."

"A place?" Angel asked.

"Oh, right, Icompletely forgot, me and the guys are gonna live here in L.A., not Giles though he's gonna be running slayer central in England. It's good to be back in the states."

"So the rugrats won't be staying here then," Spike asked, not wantingto run intothe younger slayers everywhere he went. God how he hated them.

"God no, they're all on a one way trip to England, until they've completed their training, then they'll get shipped off to demon hotspots around the world, or that's the general idea anyway. I'd love to stay but I really have to go. See you guys later?" Buffy said before getting up to leave.

"Definetely," Spike and Angel said in unison.

"Cool."

The champions kept their eyes on the blonde slayer as she left the coffee shop. When she was gone Spike decided that he would go back to his place, even the sight of Angel sickened him right now. His grandsire might as well of had Buffy sitting on his lap. The word flirting doesn't even cover what Spike had just witnessed. This morning he had been confident that Buffy liked him just as much as he liked her, but now he wasn't so sure.

"Where are you going Spike?"

"What's it to you?"

"It's just a question."

"Well... sod off you fucking wanker. I don't have to tell you anything Angel, cos unlike your other mates I don't worship the ground you walk on," Spike said, raising his voice as he walked towards the door.


	7. Rambling

**Chapter 7**

_Thank you Mary, Jessica and Wican Girl 314 for your reviews. I will try and update a.s.a.p._

Later the next day Spike got a knock at his door, only it wasn't who he thought it was gonna be.

"Harmony? What the bloody hell are you doing here?" Spike exclaimed, noticing the sun was starting to set, he couldn't believe how much time had gone past.

"Can't a friend just stop by, and since when wasn't I able to just to come into your place?"

"Harm, one, we are not friends. Two, I'm not a vampire anymore and your not on my invite list!"

"You know what, fine, I can't remember why I came over here in the first place."

"Why did you come pet?"

"I don't know. I was just lonely, I guess. I mean, well, I haven't exactly got a new job yet and I don't have any friends, so I thought, that maybe, we could hang out," Harmony answered.

"Forget it."

"We can go get drunk, if you like?"

"Ok, I'm in," Spike said grabbing his coat.

Buffy and Dawn were sitting in the living room of their new house, watching t.v.

"I can't believe we got a house so fast," Dawn said when the commercials came on.

"Me neither. It's weird huh? I mean one minute we were in Rome the next bam we're in L.A."

"Yeah, I know. Me, Xander and Tara were thinking of throwing a birthday party for Willow. You could invite Angel and Spike and their friends if you wanted. You know so there would be more people," said Dawn, hoping that Buffy would agree.

"That's a great idea, really I mean it. It would be a great way for everyone to get to know each other better."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes I'm sure, I'll ask them tomorrow, besides Willow definitely deserves a party."

"Good, then we're all set. So did you Angel have 'fun'?"

"Eww, Dawn, no and gross. I don't like talking to you about that stuff, it gives me the wiggins."

"You know I'm seventeen right, you know the age you were when you and Angel…"

"If you want to live to see Willow's party then you will end your sentence right there missy," Buffy said interrupting her sister.

"Ok, ok."

The next day Spike woke up, face down on his couch, where he had passed earlier this morning. He got up, took a look in the mirror and decided to go to bed to sleep his hangover, thanking god, or whoever the hell it was up there, that Harmony had gone back to her own place last night. She had left the bar before he had, he knew she had, it was the last thing he could remember clearly.

Spike opened his eyes when he heard a knock at the door, he thought he had only dozed off for five minutes, but saw that he had actually been asleep for five hours when he looked at his alarm clock. At least the thumping in his head had stopped. Sluggishly he got out of bed and headed for the door. As soon as he entered the living room he sensed her. Buffy was on the other side of his door. Her very presence seemed to completely wake him up. He ran to the door, hauling it open to let the slayer in.

"Hey Spike, is it ok if I come in?" Buffy asked (as if she needed to).

"Yeah sure. So what brings you here?"

'_What brings you here?' Spike thought to himself, 'I can't believe I just said that.'_

"Well, I wanted to know if you would like to come to Willow's birthday party. And I brought food, cos I figured you still didn't have anything edible in your fridge," Buffy replied, showing Spike the brown paper bags she was carrying.

"In answer to your question, yeah I'll come to the party. So what did you bring?" he asked, curious as to what Buffy had bought.

"Mostly junk food, ice-cream, cookies and so on and I also got you some steak and other dinner stuff, which I'm going to cook for you," Buffy said, walking into the kitchen and starting to unpack the food.

"You're gonna make dinner for me?" Spike inquired stunned by her gesture.

"Sure, why not?"

"I just never thought that you would actually be doing something like that for me."

"Well I am. So do you think you could find a home for all this stuff while I start on the dinner."

"Yes ma'am," he said, unable to keep the smile from his face.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Buffy smiled coyly back at him and then began the task of preparing the food. Spike offered to help her but she politely told him that he didn't have to as she was doing this for him, suggesting that he go watch t.v. or something until the dinner was ready. And besides she wanted to do it herself anyway. Spike decided he would play the new x-box game he had got the week before.

"So what did you do yesterday?" Spike asked Buffy as they sat down to eat.

"I met up with Angel and the guys, Gunn's doing fine by the way, I think he and Illyria have been living at Fred's place. Angel Investigations is up and running again someone actually came in for help yesterday, you know it was kinda weird, the whole money thing seems a little strange to me, although I guess it shouldn't cos Giles is giving me money for slaying now, but that's from the watcher's council, Angel takes the money from the people he helps, but then again he is putting his life on the line. You know I called you this afternoon but there was no answer. Where were you?"

"Well I was sle…I was out getting some more cigarettes this afternoon so you must have phoned when I was out," Spike said deciding that he didn't want Buffy to know that he had been sleeping the whole time.

"Oh. I went shopping with Angel too yesterday, clothes shopping in fact, it was so funny…"

"Was it just you and Angel? Or were the others there?"

"Nope, it was just the two of us. It was such a blast. We asked the guys if they wanted to go, but they all insisted that they were too busy. Angel is really good at picking out clothes, he has impeccable taste…and you probably really don't want to here this, I'm sorry,"

'_God, this is stupid, I can't be nervous, I have got to stop rambling' Buffy thought. _

"No need to apologise love, I did ask you what you did yesterday."

'_He called me love. Well ok he does it all the time and to other girls, but still.'_

"Right. So what do you think of the food?"

"I think it's amazing, you really are multi-talented aren't you?"

"Thanks."

They continued talking even after they had finished eating, only Buffy let Spike do most of the talking as she felt she had already said quite enough. Buffy looked at her watch totally shocked that it was now actually ten p.m.

"Look Spike, I would absolutely love to stay, believe me, but I really need to get home to Dawn. She is so gonna kill me. I promised her that I'd watch movies with her again. Right, the party's tomorrow night at seven o'clock at the Hyperion, you will be there?"

Spike nodded in reply.

"Great, gotta go, love ya, bye," she said giving him a kiss on the cheek before running to the door.

Spike stayed glued to his chair not sure if he could believe his ears. Buffy had just said 'love ya'. God he hoped she meant it.


	8. Revelation

**Chapter 8**

_Thank you Spike-n-Buffy-eva for you review, enjoy the chapter. Please R&R._

Spike had had no idea what to buy for Willow but had finally decided to get her a necklace. It was a dragonfly pendant which had a diamond body and emerald wings, quite expensive. When he walked into the building where the party was being held, he was greeted by Tara and Dawn, everyone else was already there, he scanned the room, finding that Buffy was dancing with Angel. Spike went over to Willow to give her her present, hoping she would like it.

"This is for you Red," he said handing the box over to her.

"Spike, you didn't have to... oh my god it's so beautiful!"

"You like it?"

"Spike I love it. I can't believe you would get me something like that, it's so beautiful, thank you so much," Willow said, giving him a hug.

"Why wouldn't I love, it's your birthday."

"Yeah, but I was never really that nice to you, we weren't friends or anything in Sunnydale and..."

"Well I wasn't exactly friendly to you either, what's past is past pet, we all say things we don't mean or shouldn't of said, but you should just forget about it and try and enjoy your birthday."

"Thanks Spike that's really sweet,but you did try and be friends with us and you looked after Dawn when Buffy was dead and you didn't have to..."

"Willow you don't have to explain yourself to me your a big girl and you came to your own conclusions, what matters is that we're cool now, aren't we?"

"Definetely," she said giving Spike a smile.

"Hey Willow, over here," one of her wiccan friends shouted.

"See you later," she said to Spike before turning to join her friend.

"May I have this dance?" Tara asked Spike as another song came on.

"Sure love, isn't the guy supposed to ask?"

"Now if I lived by that rule I would never get to dance, since neither Will or I are guys. I've just learned that you have to go for it."

"Very true," he said putting his hand in hers as she led him to the dance floor.

Once the song had finished Spike went and got some food from the buffet,then sitting the at one of the tables watched Buffy and Angel. Angel leaned down and lightly kissed Buffy on the lips. Buffy looked up into Angel's eyes, smiling weakly.

"Angel, I can't do this, this can't work, it's just too wierd."

"What is?"

"Kissing you. It's like kissing my brother, it kinda gives me the wiggans. It's not that I don't love you anymore, because believe me, you'll always be in my heart, But it's just, well, you know, I kinda..." Buffy trailed off as her eyes wandered over to where Spike was sitting.

"You love Spike," Angel finished for her.

"Yeah. I do. I really do. This is hard, I don't like having to hurt you Angel,but I love him, and actually have done for quite a while now, I just didn't want to believe it before. Are you mad at me?"

"Buffy. I could never be mad at you. You can't change the way you feel no more than I could make you, I kinda already knew I just didn't want to believe it either, but I want you to know that I just want you to be happy and if that's with Spike then so be it. If I was gonna lose you to anyone I'm glad it's Spike, because I know that he would never hurt you."

"Do you really mean it?"

"Cross my heart."

Buffy gave Angel a slayer-strength hug, forgetting how strong she actually was, causing Angel to say her name in pain. Spike got up off his chair and headed outside to the veranda.

"Oops, sorry Angel and thanks."

"No problem."

Buffy followed after Spike.

"Hey," Buffy said as she reached his side.

"You should go back inside."

"I don't want to."

"Shouldn't you go back to Angel, I'm sure he's a wreck by now you've been gone what two seconds."

"Spike, Angel..."

"Look, you don't have to say anything."

"Spike I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, including Angel. When you sacraficed yourself to save the world, a part of me died too. I missed you so much it hurt. And what hurt most was that you didn't believe me when I told I loved you, because I do, but I know it was my fault, I didn't exactly have perfect timing. And now your back, and even just being with you here makes me feel alive again and now that your here I don't ever want to lose you again, I couldn't bear it."

Spike stared at her, stunned into silence, trying to process what she had just told him.

"Spike please say something," Buffy said, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Buffy I love you," Spike said pulling her towards him to kiss her, running his fingers through her hair, then gently pulling away and placing his hands on her face and wiping away her tears with his thumbs. He looked into her eyes and then gave her a soft kiss.

"I love you Spike."

"You don't know how long I've waited to here you say that."

"I think I have a rough idea."

Together they walked back inside and straight onto the dance floor. They continued to dance for the rest of the night, both of them laughing when '_Wind Beneath My Wings_' came on.

As the party was coming to an end Dawn walked over to where Spike and her sister were sitting. They looked so happy together, lost in each others eyes, Dawn had to repeat Buffy's name several times before either one of them looked up.

"What, oh, I'm sorry Dawn. What were you gonna say?"

"I was just gonna ask if I could stay at Co...Willow's tonight, if it's ok with you."

"Sure, are you sure she won't mind?"

"She was the one who suggested it."

"Ok then have fun."

"Thanks Buffy."

"No problem."

Dawn hugged her sister and then walked over to Connor.

"So, do you wanna come over tonight," Buffy asked Spike coyly.

"You know I do," he said before kissing her passionately.

"So are you coming to my place," Connor asked Dawn once she was standing in front of him.

"Definetely," she replied pulling his head down to hers to give him a kiss.

The younger couple waitedto seeSpike and Buffy had leave and then left for Connor's apartment after a few minutes. Dawn truely hoped thatBuffy wouldnever find out about this. Well not in the near future anyway.


	9. Reprecussions

**Chapter 9**

_Thank you to KyouXKagura, shelly and Spike-n-Buffy-eva for your reviews. Dawn is 17 almost 18 and Connor 18 almost 19. Hope you enjoy this chapter. Just to warn you there is sexual content in the first part of this chapter. Please R&R._

The door to Buffy's house flew open, Spike and Buffy almost falling over the threshold, their lips had locked the second they got out of the car, they couldn't keep their hands off of each other. Buffy kicked the door closed and then Spike pushed her up against it he moved his head down to her neck and started to work his magic there, Buffy was now gasping for air.

"Spike…we should…take this…upstairs," Buffy said in between pants.

Spike stopped what he was doing, lifted her up into his arms and carried her upstairs to her room, placing her down on the bed when they got there. Spike took off his boots and Buffy sprang off the bed, lunging herself at Spike, attacking his mouth with hers, biting down on his lip. Pushing him up against the wall she started to undo his belt. She flung it to the side, kissing furiously again, his hands travelled up her thighs, taking her dress up with them and he pulled it right up and over her head, and then started working on her neck again. Spike then started moving her towards the bed, her legs wrapped firmly around his middle. All clothes, apart form Buffy's thong, had now been removed. He placed her down on the bed. Now straddling Buffy, he held her hands down above her head, kissing and nuzzling her and working his way down her body, starting with her lips, then trailing kisses along her neck, travelling down to her naval and then finally ripping her thong off. He playfully licked her, were she so longed for him to enter, causing her to moan, then he worked his way back up, finding her mouth again, softly kissing her lips, before thrusting into her (_ to find his sweet release_).

Their bodies moved together in perfect synchronicity. They fit perfectly together, as if they had been made for one another. Both of them were blissfully unaware of the world around them. Buffy had absolutely no idea that on the other side of town that her younger sister was losing her virginity to Angel's son. Both Dawn and Connor knew she was only seventeen, but Dawn felt she was ready and besides Buffy had slept with Angelfor the first time when she had been Dawn's age.

The next morning Connor dropped Dawn off at around ten o'clock. Buffy and Spike were still sleeping, so she quietly got changed and then went back downstairs to make herself some breakfast. When Buffy woke up Spike was still sound asleep, he looked so peaceful, she kissed him lightly on the nose, not wanting to wake him she decided that she would go for a shower.

Spike woke to find Buffy lying on top of him, tracing her fingers over his chest.

"Morning sleepy head," she said before kissing him.

"Morning love. How long have you been lying on me, well I'd say a good forty-five minutes now."

"Oh really," he said flipping her over so that he was now on top of her.

"Well, how could I resist you just looked so cute and peaceful and you always watch me sleeping so I thought I'd give it go, see what all the fuss is about."

"Cute?"

"Well when you're awake you're incredibly sexy but when you're asleep you just look so cute and it just makes me wanna love you more, which by the way would be humanly impossible because I love you so much already, no one else can make me feel the way you do."

"I know exactly what you mean," he said before kissing her again.

After Spike got dressed the two of them went downstairs for something to eat.

Angel was sitting at his desk doing some research into the demon that was pestering his latest client. He was so engrossed in his work that he didn't even notice a certain bubbly blonde vampire walk into his office.

"Hey boss, I got your coffee, and jelly donuts your favourite, oh come on why do you look so grumpy, it's a beautiful day today, why don't you go out and get some fresh air," Harmony said, wishing that Angel would be a cheery mood for a change.

Angel just sat there, looking down at his desk blankly.

"Look you were happy yesterday what changed...god how could I be so dense, this so has Buffy written all over it, is this because of the whole Buffy/Spike thing, cos if it is you need to get over it. I have."

"Harmony do we have to do this now. I just wanna be alone, can't you go do something with your friends."

"Angel you know that you and the guys are my only friends, all the other vamps hate me, cos one I work for you and you gave me this cool gem of amarra thingy which allows me to run errands during the day, and ok its not the gem of amarra, cos well you destroyed that, but it has the same purpose, besides you're in a time of need and I'm gonna stay here."

"Fine but I'm talking about it."

"Big baby," Harmony replied, turning towards the door of his office, "Well I'm going to my desk now so I'll be there if you change your mind."

When Dawn had woken up that morning she had had the feeling that there was something not quite right. She had thrown up twice before she even left Connor's. Buffy had told her that everything would be fine and that she should go to bed and rest, everything would be fine tomorrow, it was probably just something she ate. But by the sixth time she puked up she knew it had to be something more serious than an upset stomach, maybe she had some sort of virus or maybe even possessed by a demon or something. Or something was made all the more accurate when the stick Dawn that held in her hand turned blue. Now she really did wish that she had come down with some viral disease, because she had a feeling that what Buffy would do to her when she found out she was pregnant would be a thousand times worse.


	10. Real Problems, Really Suck

**Chapter 10**

_Thank you Shelly for your review hope you enjoy this chapter._

"Hey Gunn, Illyria, um Gunn, do you think that maybe you could talk to Angel, he's gone back to brooding mode, and I'm kinda getting worried."

"Sure Harmony," Gunn said before heading into the boss's office.

"Hey Angel man, what's up?" Gunn asked, sitting in the chair opposite Angel.

"Nothing."

"Angel don't give me that 'nothing' crap, I know you well enough to know when something's up, so spill, what's the deal?"

"I don't know, I guess a part of me always believed that I would end up with Buffy, but now she loves Spike and he loves her, where does that leave me? I mean, if I'm not with Buffy, then what do I do?"

"You've managed fine for five whole years without her Angel, what makes now so different?"

"Before there was always a chance she would come back to me, but now, that hope is gone, with Spike, it's final, I think she's too far gone now to turn back, and I'm left with no one, sometimes I wish I had never left Sunnydale. It's not supposed to be this way."

"Well Angel, I'm glad you left Sunnydale, I would probably still be on the streets if it wasn't for you, or in prison, or even worse still,I might have been dead by now, like many others. Angel you've touched so many lives, think of all the people you've saved and that includes the rest of the guys..."

"Yeah, and look where they are now, they're all dead, because of me. Doyle, Cordy, Fred, Wes. Because of me they're gone and nothing can bring them back."

"Ok, yeah, but if it wasn't for you, none of them would of had the chance to help save this sorry world, just by knowing you they got their expiration dates were postponed. We are all better people having been your friend, and you know it. They never would have gotten as far as they did if it hadn't been for you. You need to stop beating yourself up about it Angel. It wasn't your fault, it was never your fault, we signed on to save the world, we knew there were consequences, and it was a risk we were all willing to take, we all believed that it was something worth fighting for. You may be the boss, but in the end, we all make our own decisions."

"I know, but I can't help but feel responsible, but thanks Gunn, that means a lot."

"No problem, I suggest that you come to terms with what I said though, cos you're gonna stay miserable if you don't."

"I will, but it will take time."

"Then let it take time, we just want you to be happy Angel, you deserve it man."

"Thanks."

After breakfast, Buffy went to check on Dawn before she and Spike went out on their first official date. Dawn had pretended to be asleep when her sister came in the room, Buffy had gone over to her bed gave her a kiss on the forehead before leaving. Dawn ran over to her window to make sure they were gone before going downstairs. She picked up the phone and was halfway through dialling Connor's number when she changed her mind, slamming down the phone. She didn't know what to say to Connor or anyone for that matter, _'Hi Connor last night was great, oh and I'm pregnant with your baby by the way.' _She had to tell someone though, she would explode if she had to keep something like that to herself, but who would she tell. Well she couldn't tell Xander because well that was out of the picture because he would freak big time, Willow and Tara would want me to tell Buffy. Anya, well she's just a big blabbermouth. She decided to watch tv to take her mind off the whole thing, she would have to figure everything out later.

Buffy and Spike had gone to the movies, and were now sitting in an ice-cream parlour, sharing a sundae.

"I can't believe we got away with it," Buffy said, feeding Spike more ice-cream.

"Well there weren't many people there and the movie was pretty loud."

"Yeah but what if one of the ushers had caught us?"

"Well they might've learned something," Spike said, watching Buffy blush, he loved it when she did that.

"Spike."

He leaned over the table and kissed her. He was amused that Buffy still got embarrassed about doing it in public, considering all the places that they actually had done it back in Sunnydale. Nevertheless he loved to watch her cheeks go pale pink, tilting her head down and that smile, she looked so adorable.

"I think we should go back home now, just to check and see that Dawn is ok," Buffy said looking back into those amazingly blue eyes.

"Ok then, let's go."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I am pet."

When they got back Spike suggested that he go check on Dawn, Buffy had wanted to check on her but decided that it would be a good idea.

"Dawn, love, it's me, are you awake, just wanted to make sure you were ok."

"Hey Spike," Dawn said rolling over to face Spike, her tears glinting as the light caught them.

"What's wrong pet, you want me to get Buffy?"

"No, Spike don't get her."

"Why not?"

"There's something I need to tell you but you have to promise not to tell Buffy, please."

"Ok, I promise," he said sitting down beside her on the bed and giving her a reassuring smile.

"Well, last night Connor and I well, you know and well today I..."

"What is it?"

"Well, I'm pregnant."

"What?"

"I'm pregnant, I know it's sudden, and I didn't believe it at first, but I took a test, and now I don't know what to do, and you were the only person I could tell, cos I trust you."

"Well Dawn, I don't know what to say, I'm feeling a mixture of shock and flattery. I won't tell Buffy if you don't want me to, but I think you should tell her."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, I will tell her, eventually, but not right now, I haven't even told Connor yet."

"Do you want me to go with you to tell him, for moral support?"

"Yes, would you, thank you Spike, your the greatest," Dawn said, hugging him.

"No problem niblet."

As she looked out over the city, she wondered what she was going to do, should she call Angel, or would it be better to just show up, well he would probably think it was a practical joke if she called him, so she decided that she would go see him in the morning, besides she was really tired from her transdimensional journey from heaven. She needed to come up with something to say anyway, she started wracking her brain as she descended the hilltop. It probably wouldn't take her long to come up with something though, because if there was one thing Cordelia Chase was great at it was talking.


	11. Love Is All You Need

**Chapter 11**

_Thank you to Shelly and Slayer Forever for your reviews, hope you enjoy this chapter. **Please R&R.**_

The next morning when Spike woke up, Buffy was already gone, she had left a note, she had left a note telling Spike that she had decided to go for a jog and would be back soon. Just as he put the letter down a blood curdling scream came from the direction of Dawn's room. Spike pulled on his boxers and ran to Dawn's room to see what all the commotion was about. As he neared her door he could hear crying from inside the room. Gently he knocked on the door.

"Dawn love, what's wrong? Can I come in?"

There was no answer, but her sobbing became louder. Spike opened the door and entered the room. Dawn had her back to him.

"Dawn wh..." he stopped. Dawn had just turned round, and it had now become very apparent what was wrong.

He walked over to her, taking her into his arms.

"It's going to be ok pet, I promise you it's going to be ok," he said rubbing her back soothingly.

"What am I going to do? Buffy's so going to kill me."

"No she won't, she might not even notice," he said, not quite believing the second part himself.

"How will she not notice, look at me, I'm like at least six months pregnant, it's not natural, and well kinda hard to miss."

"Dawn, calm down, we'll work something out. I promise. Please just stop crying, please. I don't like to see you like this, upset I mean. Why don't you just get back into bed and I'll get you something to eat."

"Ok. Thanks Spike. Wait can you call Connor, I want to tell him. There's no way I can leave the house now, and besides he has a right to know."

"Sure thing pet. What will I say to him?"

"Just tell him I need to see him."

* * *

Cordelia stood in front of the Hyperion, taking in a deep breath before finally taking those last few steps to enter that building. Just as she walked through the doors, Angel was coming out of his office and when their eyes locked he ran forward taking her into his embrace, kissing her passionately before she could even say a single word. 

"Hey," she managed to say, barely above a whisper, as they pulled apart.

"Hey," Angel echoed gently.

"Well that went better than I expected. I didn't even have to give you that speech I've been working on."

"Well since you obviously put some time into it, don't you think that you should tell me anyway."

"It's really long. Besides I think the kiss said just about everything."

"But still. It's been a long week, maybe you could just give me the jist."

"But that was..."

"Just about but not completely, come on Cordelia, I'm not getting any older, humour me."

"Ok then Angel. I love you. There I said it. There was some other stuff that led up to that but I just realised that I'm not some rambling beat around the bush Buffy person. I get to the point. So that's the it, I love you Angel."

"I love you."

"You do?"

"I do."

"Wow. This is happening right? I mean cos if it's a dream, then I'm so not waking up."

"No it's real..."

"But?"

"But? No, there's no but. I guess it's just finally sinking in that I don't love Buffy like that anymore, I mean I just always assumed that she and I would be together in the end. And then something happened between you and me,and then that got messed up, and then I lost you, and then Buffy chose Spike over me. I thought I was gonna be alone for the rest of my immortal life. But now you're here..."

"I get it. You thought that if you weren't allowed love, then you would still have to atone for something, you would still have to pay, still get punished for what you've done."

"Right. How do you know?"

"Believe me I know. You're not the only person who had to atone for things. Now shut up and kiss me."

"You got it."

"No. I've got you."

* * *

"Hey B! Over here!" 

"Faith! Hey," Buffy said as she made her way over to the brunette slayer,"So how are you?"

"I'm five by five B. You?"

"I'm of the good," Buffy smiled coyley.

"Oh my god. Shut up. So who's the guy?"

"What guy?"

"The guy."

"Faith are you feeling ok, you do remember the conversation we had about headbutting right, cos there is no guy."

"Sure there isn't. Don't play dumb with me Buffy. I know when someone's got laid. So who's bones did you jump?"

"Faith," Buffy said, blushing deeply as she stared down at the ground.

"Come on B spill, the shade you went just now proves you got lucky."

"Spike. It was Spike..."

"Alright B."

"It was good. Amazing really. It was like nothing has ever felt so good ever. Like in the history of the world."

"Ok spare me the gushy details."

"So what's happening? Any new demons on the radar?"

"Not a blip. And I gotta say B, I'm not lovin' it. I just wanna kill somethin'. Of the demon variety of course."

"Right. I wasn't even...cos you don't...not anymore...right?"

"Right."

"Good. Then...good. Everything's good."

"Yeah. I should probably..."

"Go."

"I mean the guys are waitin' on me..."

"Sure. No problem. I should get back to Spike and Dawn anyway, check and see if everything's ok."

"Yeah well see ya later."

"See ya later," Buffy said as she watched Faith walk away, although Buffy wasn't quite ready to go home just yet, there was something she had to do.


End file.
